The Most Stressful Job Program I Went Through

Do You Understand Why We Stress The Importance Of Education? This Is Why.

In 2017, I went through a program that I thought would help me find a job. It turned out to be useless and stressful. I don’t think they even help you with employment, to begin with. I thinking this is a result of that lady invalidating my autism, thus causing me to not get placed properly. My mom found this place in May. This place assisted people with disabilities to help them with employment. My initial thought of this program is that they help you build your skills for the type of job you are trying to get. Take someone who is skilled in numbers, help them find an accountant job or help them build their skills.

 It was not like that. I believe because the counselor they gave me refused to believe I have autism, this caused me to not get the help that I need. I talked about my issues with the coach in a previous post. My mom was even on point with my psych until that idiot lady brainwashed her. I met with the coach in private. I thought I made it clear the type of job that I needed. I met with the coach 1 on 1 before starting and I thought the info I told her, she would keep that in mind with understanding my limitations. WRONG. My short term memory is poor, so I had missed or forgotten a lot of information. I was placed in a group with people who were previously employed.

How could I get help when I am in a group full of people with different struggles?
The first day of the club was a few days after. I will call the coach Sarah. On the first day of the club, Sarah jumps right into the job interview questions/basics. Aren’t you supposed to build your resume or cover letter? This was a sign that I missed that this club would not help me. Perhaps the other members had jobs before but had to leave due to their disorder or sickness.

Another sign is I felt the coach expects us to have no lives.  I saw a message on the board saying if you are going to concerts etc are you ready to work. WTF? Are people supposed to have no lives? You’re telling me people don’t deserve to treat themselves every now and then? If you don’t have a job you can’t buy concert tickets, to begin with. Unless the participants received disability benefits. You can’t live on 700 dollars a month. Each meeting, Sarah would ask us what jobs have we applied to. Because I missed this, I thought that applying was optional.

Whenever I didn’t apply for a job or didn’t send out enough applications to please Sarah, she would pressure me. Like ‘you need to be committed.’ She just assumes we don’t care if we are not applying for enough jobs. She is working with disabled people. Does she not understand it’s not that easy for disabled people to find jobs? That’s why they are attending the damn program! Does she not understand employers are ableist and agest? They don’t wanna hire disabled people or people over a certain age. My golden rule with a program from this point is to find out if they’re contracted with employers. As long as employers discriminate, no amount

 of job programs will work.

That program can train me until the cows come home. If my resume gets turned down or I am turned away after an interview because of my autism and the stigma then the program is doing me no good.


I didn’t apply for a job and I told Sarah things have been crazy and she continued to pressure me. I e-mailed Sarah that I just could not handle the program anymore and she would not understand. I felt if she understand she would have said ‘if you want to leave the club you may, I will have Sally(what we’re gonna call the ignorant lady) close your case.’  But now, she proceeds to go on about how would be able to attend a job. I started to get burnout and I was only going to the club for a few weeks. I asked her if I can opt-out and proceeds to be like ‘no you can’t if you don’t show up we close your case. It’s up to you if you follow the rules or not.’ Sarah didn’t care at all about my mental health. All she cares about is a job.  She only gave you 3 days to miss. She expects you to have no life outside of that stupid club. If she understood that people have lives, she would not have been so pushy when I didn’t send in enough applications. Sarah is a ‘job coach’ but doesn’t understand that

  • disabled people are discriminated against by employers
  • employers do not want to hire disabled people
  • jobs are hard to find and it’s getting harder
  • some areas have more jobs than others and my area had fewer jobs than everyone else.


This should have been another red flag, I couldn’t opt-out. Another red flag is I told her I may miss days if my grandma has to take my grandpa anywhere and said I couldn’t miss any days unless it’s job-related (eg interviews, volunteering) telling me to ‘take the bus’ remember I am UNEMPLOYED not getting disability checks and this ‘coach’ expects me to take the bus which you need MONEY for. If the fare is 3 dollars I’d need 18 dollars a week. Think about if I have to catch 3 buses.

What kinda people do they think they’re working with, drones? What if someone in the family dies? The last thing a grieving person needs is a stupid job program and that lady hounding them for not applying for enough jobs.

Let’s put it this way. Let’s say I had joint pains, I couldn’t do retail nor fast food. Would’t be able to stand for several hours, unload trucks, stock shelves or prep food due to my pain. Can’t do office jobs due to the fact most of them are down town and you have to commute via train and I wouldn’t be able to climb all of those stairs and walk from the stop to the building and vice versa. I think maybe this program knows what I can do. Only to get some idiot in invalidates my disorder, refuses to listen when I try to explain, get misplaced, put in the wrong group only for a ‘job coach’ to do nothing to help me find a job, expect me to apply to jobs when I clearly need help looking for places to apply to. And the coach assumes I don’t care about the program when I don’t apply when in reality I am struggling.

She never thought that I was struggling to find a job to apply for, I guess she thought adding more pressure to me was ‘help.’ It’s like the lady is there for show and they didn’t do a single thing that would actually help me.

One day, we did mock interviews. Sarah asked me the ‘tell me about yourself question’ I messed up on the question and Sarah kept asking questions when she knows I do not have any work experience. She could have modified the questions for me at least.


I asked Sarah how much longer is this club and she says ‘forever, until you get a job.’ So what if I am out of luck and just can’t get hired? I come until I die? Sarah is pretty dumb for a job coach. Jobs are getting harder and harder to get. I can understand the club being for a few weeks or months, but until you can get a job? Remember employers are ablest. So if someone is out of luck and can’t get hired they’re confined to that program.

All they seemed ever do is job interviews, it seems like they don’t even show you how to perfect your resume (or CV if you are not American), how to do a cover letter. Have employers come in and you can explain the needs you will require so they can keep it in mind if they hired you. I mean I started in September and left after Thanksgiving so I don’t know what they did after I left. But 50% of the time before I left it was job interview stuff.

What folks need to understand is employers do discriminate against disabled people. A non-disabled person can make 10 bucks an hour and a disabled person gets 8 bucks an hour. You can have all the programs in the world. If nothing is being done about the discrimination, you’re wasting your time with programs. I mean to see if they’re contracted with any companies.

I had a staffing meeting. Sarah just assumes I am being held back from applying. I don’t think she will ever understand how hard jobs are to find/get and how limited someone can be due to where they live. I was on the verge of a break down due to all of the pressure Sarah was putting on me. I said I was getting therapy because I knew she would let me go.  I wasn’t planning on coming back so I just said give me a year. I deleted the number from my phone and threw away the card. I am cleaning my e-mails. I will delete any e-mails I saved from this program

How can Sarah be a disability job coach and not understand the discrimination when it comes to disabled people? That keeps them from getting hired. She could have done something about the discrimination rather than doing job interviews.

Remember, programs won’t do anything if nothing is being done about the discrimination, ableism that disabled people face.

I left the program after 2/3 months. I was not getting the help I needed and I ended up struggling. All because one person refused to believe I am autistic.

Why place someone with no work experience with a group full of people with experience? They should have placed me in a beginner’s group or something.

 Even if I didn’t have autism, at this point getting a job will be close to impossible since the last thing I did was back in 2011-2013.

Employers won’t even look at something that far away. When you put down your last job on an application the potential employer will contact the last employer as a reference. Employers look at something recent. I don’t think something from 2012-2013 will cut it

I posted a vlog on my Verond channel. You can check it out here. Sometimes I post content on Verond.

This video will tell you about that lady.

Here is an older video I did.

3 Comments

  • halconius January 21, 2020 at 9:46 pm

    I’m sorry the job coach did not understand your needs. It’s so frustrating.

    Reply
    • aaliyahholt January 21, 2020 at 9:47 pm

      Funny thing is that when I met with her privately, I thought she’d keep the info I gave her in mind.

      Reply
  • Reasons Why I Hate Being Autistic – The Lone Aspie January 30, 2020 at 3:54 pm

    […] and I ended up struggling throughout the program as a result of this. I talked about this here. That article talks about how I struggled. This article talks about the arrogant lady. People […]

    Reply

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