Being An Adult On The Spectrum Is Worse Than You Think
I’d like you to read the blog. Gather the information before you make judgments. It’s rough for anyone on the spectrum. Getting demonized by Nts for not being like them. The list can go on. I think being an adult on the spectrum is worse. For instance, the support we may have during school goes away when we become adults. This tells me people think autism just drops off the earth when we turn 18. This is false. Autism does not go away at 18. There is something call adults with autism. We are lonely in this world.
I lost count on how many times I have had requests for me to thrive denied because I am an adult. Last year, I had to be interviewed by a doctor from SSI. Interviews make me extremely anxious. I just don’t know how to answer certain questions. I asked for my mom to come with me ONLY for her to inform the doctor of my anxiety and to not let it influence his decision or to clarify a question he may ask because I will misunderstand the question. It was denied of course, because I am an adult. Some people with extreme anxiety will get mutism (the inability to speak for themselves). As a result of my request is denied, I was denied SSI fast. I think I may have misunderstood a question I was asked and my answer gave the doctor the impression that I did not need SSI. At least my mom could have gone over the interview with me. To inform me of possible trick questions and what to say. Sometimes those doctors may ask trick questions or do something to see if you really need SSI (ex drop a pen)
Because I was apply for mental conditions, probably asked a trick question.
Remember people with autism do not pick up social cues. So it’s possible I missed cues that the guy was tricking me. If you were applying for a physical condition, the guy may drop a pen and judge based on how fast you pick it up. If it takes you 5 minutes just to get in a position to get it, he will know you can’t work if you can’t even pick up a pen fast. On the other hand, for a mental condition or maybe in invisible condition like IBS, its unclear what the guy will do to ‘test’ your work ability. He probably figured since I answered his questions I can work. So it’s possible stigmas is what caused me to get denied after the interview. Rather than looking at how the person can do ‘easy jobs’ you got to look at other stuff.
This all boils down to having my request denied. It’s sad that people want to deny people with disabilities requests because they’re adults. Disabilities aren’t nuked from existence when someone becomes an adult. Imagine being an adult with autism, you need a certain request. Someone denies it because you’re an adult and you fail as a result of not having your request granted. It’s easier when you are a kid or teen because a doctor won’t see you without a parent or guardian because you have to be 18. As a little example. Therefore you have someone to speak for you in the event you can’t. Also a child can’t legally consent to treatment or whatever the doctor has to do. You have someone to help you. A world that just looks at my age rather than why I am asking for help, I can’t thrive in a world like that. Would you look at a person in a wheelchair or struggling to walk and say ‘sorry, I can’t help you, you’re an adult. You need to learn to walk by yourself.’ Why do that to us if you wouldn’t do it to someone with a physical disorder? Think of it this way, turning away our requests because we’re adults, imagine that’s one wheelchair you’re denying for a physically disabled person. That’s one hearing aid you’re denying a deaf person, that’s one walking stick thing you’re denying a blind person. Enough is enough. Nts need to stop holding us on their standards. We will NEVER be like you Nts, so stop trying to make it happen, it’s not going to happen!
I am implying the treatment towards people with visible disabilities vs invisible disabilities.
Maybe if we had more education and acceptance for autism, maybe it will be easier for us. I don’t think Nts will ever get it. Instead of trying to make us accommodate the Nts, get a feel of how we learn, how we operate, etc. You are damaging us trying to make us like Nts, that’s saying you can’t accept us for us and we need to be like this to please you. If someone needs a request, give it to them. Don’t use them being an adult as an excuse. I can sign papers, I just need someone to explain what I am signing. I don’t understand how some people explain things. Giving my history with Nts, they get annoyed and insult me. So I ask for someone to come with me to clarify to save trouble. That is all. Really. I guess a small adjustment is ‘too much’ for the Nts thus that’s why they deny our requests.
I don’t hate ALL NTS, just the ones who bully people with disabilities, mental illnesses etc. Its just hard to believe there is still good in people when you were treated like shit your entire life.